The Rules of Skilled Nursing

So, I was worried about having to learn about MediCal now that Dad will be moving to a nursing facility.  What I should have been focusing on was the difference between Assisted Living/Alzheimer's homes vs. a Skilled Nursing Facility.  There are a lot more rules in these types of facilities...

For example, we just recently found out that Dad is not allowed to be on an anti-psychotic drug.  Since these drugs are really meant for patients with mental disorders like Schizophrenia or Bipolar Disorder, the skilled nursing homes cannot administer these drugs to Alzheimer's patients.  I don't know for sure if the problem is with anti-psychotic drugs or with drugs that have the federal black box warning on them, but it's basically the same thing.  (I understand the origin of these rules... the government is trying to stop the over-medicating of patients in nursing homes, which is a good thing.  But what about when someone really needs the drug?)

So our problem is that Dad is on Olanzapine (Zyprexa) which seems to be curbing his aggression really well.  The skilled nursing home that I toured the other day said they would just take him off the drug.  But, again... we have a problem.  Patients on these drugs need to be slowly weaned off in a controlled environment and then once that happens, doesn't that mean Dad would just become aggressive again?  And I think we know what will happen next.  He will be kicked out of the Nursing Home because they won't be able to handle him.

When I shared my revelations with the Doctor and Social Worker at the VA, they seemed surprised.  Needless to say, Dad isn't moving anywhere until we can get the medication figured out.  And the Social Worker assured me that if he was kicked out of the new home that they would just return him back to the psych ward.  So much flip-flopping around.  Poor Dad.

The only good news is, I really liked the home that I toured.  It's called Del Rio in the city of Bell Gardens and the facility has big outdoor spaces, wide hallways, and a clean appearance.  I kind of like that it backs up to the LA River too.  It seems appropriate since Dad is a genuine Angeleno.

Assessment

We have some movement in Dad's ongoing future housing/financial prospects.  As I reported a couple of months ago, we had completed his application to a Veterans Association facility for Alzheimer's Patients and were waiting for the next step.  That next step is today.  The Assessment.

Dad's appointment is at 12:15 today at the new facility and will start with a tour and then end with an assessment by 3-4 different people.  We're all a little worried.  If you count from when we pick him up at Valley View Gardens to when we drop him off... this is shaping up to be a 6 hour excursion for my Dad.  (A 2 hour excursion is pushing it for someone at my Dad's level.)

The biggest worry is that the letter we received in the mail states "The assessment portion will begin at 1:00... and should be completed by 3:15.... The assessment includes sharing information with a physician, registered nurse, and social worker individually." And apparently I'm not allowed in the room with him.  Um, Hello?  What kind of answers or conversation do they think they will get from an Alzheimer's patient?  And two hours?  It's difficult to keep his attention for 10 minutes.  And I'm also worried about his mood or if he will be scared to go into a room with a bunch of strangers.  There are so many unpredictable factors that make us uneasy.

So, the truth of the situation:  this is our last hope.  It has to work.  Dad's money runs out soon, and this is the only place that will work with him financially and give him a decent place to live.  There are no other choices.  This is it.

Cross your fingers for us today.  

On a personal note... Dad's Grand-daughter was born on March 10th.  Emry Phebe Hardin is beautiful and healthy and will get to meet her Grandpa today!  It's also my husband's 30th Birthday today!  We have a lot to celebrate.  Hopefully that will continue to be true after Dad's assessment.

A Visit from an Old Friend... :/

A visit from an old friend... SCABIES.  Yep, Dad has scabies again.  Woo Hoo.  He had it a year ago for the first time, and then he got it again this past September.  I fought hard in September to get Dad the oral medication as well as the cream, but they would not oblige me.  I told them that our past experience with the rash/skin mite was that it didn't go away easily and we spent hours and countless appointments to eradicate the problem only to find out that the oral medication worked quite well in the end.  This was the snooty response I got from the nurse practitioner in September, "I've been a nurse for 20 years, and I know that the cream will work just fine."  RIGHT.  Well, it's possible that that same case may have been dormant for the past few months and then resurfaced again this month. 

Anyway, we got a Derm appointment at the VA which was not easy to come by, and we actually requested it back in September... so when I turned out not to be available to take Dad to this appointment, there was no way that we were going to cancel.  (Because the VA reschedules you on their own time, and that could be forever...).  My Mom luckily was able to fit this errand into her hectic end-of-year work schedule where she tries to see the majority of her clients one last time before the holidays. 

Long story short, between the two of us, this appointment took a total of 4 1/2 hours of our time.  And because of that, I was able to meet them at the VA after my Sassy Songbirds performance.  The wait to see the doctor was long, and then the wait for the pharmacy was even longer and didn't even result in us leaving with the medication.  The doctors totally over-reacted, some left the exam room afraid of the contagious nature of this skin disease, and when I found my Mom, they had freaked her out so badly that she was wearing gloves trying not to touch my Dad.  I tried to wear the gloves, but I couldn't do anything with them on... like eat or check my phone, so I took them off.  It's true it is contagious, but I've never gotten it from him, and it's kind of hard to get an Alzheimer's patient to follow you through crowds in a government building without putting a hand on his back to guide him. 

So, gloves or no gloves, we were hanging out in public for 2 hours at the pharmacy waiting for Dad's medication and sitting next to a guy that kept yelling, "Wish we had a TV in here!!!" every ten minutes.  His motto was that if you didn't make a noise, then nothing would get done.  We always meet interesting people in the VA.  :)  Maybe if I yelled that my Dad had a contagious skin disease, then we would have gotten his medication on time. 

I got the Oral and Cream the next morning and brought it to Valley View Gardens.  Just wanted to share some photos of Dad's arms and what Scabies potentially looks like...

Dad's future housing prospects....

 (doesn't Dad look handsome?!)
So, I'm not sure I've shared our housing plans for Dad's future fully to our audience.  As most of you know, his savings is quickly running out, which is why we had to move him to Valley View Gardens in the first place.  They gave us an amazing deal/discount at $3000/month (compared to $4200 at Whittier Place).  That is a steal for Alzheimer's care.  We all know now from my recent blogs, that their so-called "Alzheimer's Care" isn't top notch and they aren't experts in the least, but we gotta take what we can get.  Three months into him staying at Valley View, they were supposed to raise his rate to $3500, but since we have shared our desperate financial issues with them, they haven't raised their prices on my trouble-making Dad.  I'd like to divulge my Dad's SS and Retirement income versus the price of care on the blog so everyone can be learning just as we are how expensive long term care is even if you have some moderate monthly income, but we all know that it isn't the smartest idea to put all that out on the public web.  But, I'm sure you get the idea...

Anyway, the Veterans Association in West LA has been working on opening a Memory Care facility within their new skilled nursing home for a couple years now.  We were smart enough to get him on the wait list a long time ago, and we've stayed on top of their progress.  When we moved him to Valley View back in July, all we knew was that the VA was hoping to open this new facility some time in February 2012.  So, our plan was to make Dad's savings last until then.

My mom has made many phone calls to the VA asking a million questions and she has also stopped by a few times.  Because of our persistence, we started the application process nice and early, which turned out to be a positive since there were many steps to getting it completed.  This application was a thick packet with many sections to it.  Once we turned that in, they needed a copy of his DD214 military form, then they needed a recent physical, then they needed his medical records, and then they needed to see Dad's original DD214 form (don't know why the copy didn't satisfy)... FINALLY we got the letter that his application was complete!  Now it's a waiting game. 
(the picture below is my elated face when I made my final trip to the post office to send in the last part of Dad's application)

I'm assuming that we're not going to hear anything until after the holidays, but we're hopeful.  And we've kept Valley View Gardens in the know about all of this and they are willing to work with us if February turns into March... etc. 

If all goes as planned, the move will be a little challenging as it will land right in my last month of pregnancy (I'm due March 2nd), so we'll find a way to make it work -- Megan, My Mom, Husband and our amazingly supportive family will I'm sure step up as usual.

A big THANK YOU  to Ani at the VA admissions office who took our many phone calls and questions, and who ultimately helped us get everything in order for my Dad's application!

Broken Nose!

It's been a year and 4 months since the traumatic day that Dad ran away from Whittier, was found at a Fire Station an hour later, and was brought via Ambulance to the Hospital. That was a long day with a lot of drama. I gotta say yesterday's stint in the ER was much more pleasant and filled with much less drama... not to mention that we actually got to choose the Veteran's Association ER, so we won't be pummeled with $9000 in hospital and ambulance fees again!

Turns out that Dad has a broken nose... here's the story I got over the phone from Valley View Gardens:

A male caregiver was helping Dad get dressed yesterday morning and Dad was refusing to let the t-shirt go over his head. I don't know whether it was claustrophobia, or stubborness, or just a weird phobia at the moment, but he did not want to put his shirt on. Hence, he became very agitated and hit the caregiver in the mouth. The caregiver had some blood in his mouth and ended up with a swollen lip. As soon as Dad hit the guy, he turned around to bolt out of the room and ran nose first into the door.


I was shocked to hear about his violent behavior and the nurse let me know that Dad's nose was swollen, red, and bruising. By the end of the conversation, she was convinced it was broken and that I needed to come over soon. I was hoping not to spend my Sunday sitting in the ER, but we went over there and the minute I saw his nose, I was stunned. Yes, we would be going to the ER right away. It was so huge, the tissue around his eyes were swollen, and one eye was already black... he looked like those vampires on the 90s TV show "Buffy and the Vampire Slayer".... it sounds weird, but I am going to find a picture and you'll agree.

Dad was in a great mood and was so excited to see us... "Wow, what a lovely day!" Yes, it's so lovely hanging out in the ER. He wasn't in much pain, so he didn't really realize what he had done to his nose. Luckily, there weren't a lot of people in the waiting room, and we got seen pretty quickly. The X-ray took a little longer, but we finally got the diagnosis that his nose was broken. Megan showed up at the point to take over the duties and get him his pain prescriptions. We all pretty much agreed that there would be no reason to re-set Dad's nose in 10 days once the swelling went down unless it was hampering his breathing. I would love to explain to Dad, "Okay, now, they're gonna stick their fingers up your nose and break it again so that it will get better." Hahaa, yeah right.

Could this incident have been avoided? Maybe, maybe not. The caregivers are aware that Dad responds better to women, so I'm not sure why they paired him with a man yesterday. I'm sure he wouldn't have hit a woman in the mouth. There were also no witnesses and we have no idea if the man stayed calm or if he was pressuring Dad to get dressed. He only responds to calm and sweet personalities who ask him or prompt him to do something instead of telling him to do it. We have no idea. Mom, Megan and I are planning to visit Valley View Gardens tomorrow morning so we can all get on the same page about Dad's care plan.

Oh, and the bruising and swelling will get worse before it gets better, so I'm sure I'll have some photos to be sharing over the next few days. He really does look like a vampire... proof is below....

The Future

So, we've put it off long enough... it's now time to take action on Dad's financial situation and his future. I'm going to be honest and really break it down. It's a tough situation.

Dad's monthly income from Teamsters and Social Security is $1800 SHORT for what he owes Whittier Place each month. We've been supplementing that difference with his savings which is dwindling fast. It comes down to this: He can only afford to stay at Whittier Place through December. And we should probably move him faster than that so that he still has some savings left.

We possibly could have chosen a cheaper place back in April 2010. But we had to take into consideration location, amenities, and the fact that we were desperate. And, Whittier Place is cheaper than most for the quality. But what would you do? Stick him in a home where there is no outside area, the hallways are dark and dingy, and every resident is 90 years old and on their death bed? Because we saw plenty of those and it was depressing to say the least. Let's remember that Dad is only 71 years old.

So, we can't look back at the decisions we made, only the future. All I can say is we gave him a year and half of an amazing home filled with laughter, love, and friendly people who genuinely care for him. And it's going to break our hearts the day he moves out. Literally.

So, what are his options?

-Move him to a Board & Care which will be lower in cost but still probably not low enough. It's a house with a couple full-time care givers and maybe 5 other residents. We originally tried to move him to one in April 2010 but he ran away in the rain and we found him on the streets of Huntington Beach. They are usually not equipped for Alzheimer's patients. He would walk right out the front door or climb out the window.

-Move him to an extremely cheap and disgusting Dementia Ward where he'll never see the light of day because the less expensive ones don't have a garden or are on the 2nd floor of a building and the residents never go outside. The thought of him not being able to go outside and being locked indoors like a caged animal made me cry. I don't know if we could even find one cheap enough. Also, many of the cheaper facilities are really far away from Me and Megan. Whittier Place is already so far away.

-Appeal to MediCal for the Assisted Living Waiver which is really just for people who are in Skilled Nursing who need to move to Assisted Living. But he does fall under the category of needing 24 hour care like Skilled Nursing, and technically he lives in an Assisted Living facility with a dementia ward. It's a long shot and probably won't work.

The only hope we have is that the Veterans Association is opening up a huge Alzheimer's facility in Los Angeles and we were smart enough to put him on the wait list a while back. The home is supposed to open in February 2012 (but you never know if that will be pushed back). Dad will get an application and it's supposed to be first come first serve. It's a lot of 'if's' to put our hope on.

Okay, let's just say that it all works out and he can move into that brand new facility in February. I'm sure you've done the math. Where is he going to go for the month of January or possibly part of February? Do we move him soon to a cheaper place and then move him again in February? 2 moves? Talk about trauma to both him and us! Or do we fund-raise to keep him in Whittier Place through January? Or maybe they'll strike us a deal for just one month. And what if he doesn't get accepted into that new facility or the date of the opening gets pushed back?

This is what we're dealing with right now. My Mom has been making a lot of phone calls to help us out and we're laying all the options out on the table. One resource we called said nicely, "His income is actually quite high, I get people who only have $500 income/month. And they don't know what to do either."

All I can say is I'm fired up to fund-raise for the Walk this year. An angry fired up. These are tough, desperate situations and it's only going to be more of a drain on the government when the Baby Boomers are added to the mix. We need resources and awareness and help! Oh, and a cure would be nice too.

-

Rubber Glove

I snapped on a rubber glove today just for Dad. OH, the things we do for him. But I'll get to that in a minute.

It was time for Dad's yearly physical, and since the nurse practitioner we were previously seeing left the office to work elsewhere, we were happy to meet the new Doctor. Overall, Dad is looking pretty healthy -- good blood pressure, no fever, high spirits etc. The nurse did an Alzheimer's test on Dad... for those of you not familiar with these tests, they ask questions like: What year is it? What season is it? Can you name 3 objects? Repeat after me... Depending on how many questions are answered and answered correctly, they can usually get an idea of what stage of dementia they are dealing with.

Not surprisingly Dad couldn't do any of the test. So, it's safe to say he's advanced Alzheimer's at least in the cognitive stage. He can still talk, and sometimes say words or small sentences that make sense, but a lot of time it's gibberish. But physically, he's still going strong and he was in a great mood today. When the nurse said he had beautiful daughters, Dad replied, "Well, I'll deal with it, I guess." I also asked him to guess how old I was and he said, "Better not. I'm gonna get in trouble, I think." That made the other patients in the waiting room laugh.

Right before we left, they requested a urine sample, and Megan informed me that since she helped him with it last time, that it was my turn. Hence, the rubber glove. I gotta say, after I whined, squirmed, and wrinkled my nose it could have been worse. I just kind of moved the cup into the stream and viola!! He had good focus and concentration today, so I lucked out. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for Megan's experience last time. Sorry Meg.

Tip

Tip:
Don't call the VA when you're already in a bad mood or feeling emotional. Cause you'll just end up crying after being on hold for 31 minutes to find out you've been transferred to the wrong people, and everything you thought was resolved last week is still a mess. Am I seriously having the same conversation with his clinic that I had last week and the week before???? Why is nothing getting done!

And I didn't even get my questions answered about Dental!

Still can't get my Dad's Galantamine refilled. He's been without it now for about 10 days.

A month in the life of Dad

Well, Dad continues to do well, and we continue to have more of our life back, while still enjoying those visits with Dad. Just some updates in Dad's world:

-His roommate is on Hospice. Whittier Place called to ask me if we wanted the roommate to move or if we were comfortable with him staying with Dad. We figured things were fine the way they were, and Dad really likes his roommate. One of the care-givers even told us that if Dad sees his roommate sleeping, he'll even go up to him and cover him up with a blanket. So sweet.

-The Director of Memory Care, Lourdes, is leaving Whittier Place. While we are very sad to see her go, she is moving up and will be in an executive position at another Alzheimer's home in Costa Mesa. It was so obvious how much love and passion she has for her job, and we couldn't have gotten through those first 6-8 months without her. I had more of a relationship with her than I did my Dad... that's how much we talked. She had great instincts about Dad and was always offering her help. Thank you Lourdes. You will be missed at Whittier Place.

-I attended a 'Family Meeting' the other day at Whittier Place, and every family member seemed to know who Dad was. "We love Dave!" "You're Dave's daughter?" "He's so sweet and funny." Hahaha. Made me smile.

-We've been dealing with Dad's prescriptions again... the transfer over from his old VA in Loma Linda to Long Beach really was pretty easy except the Prescriptions! I think we finally got it sorted out, but Whittier place was giving him the wrong dosage of Galantamine (which is the generic for Aricept - The Alzheimer's Pill). Loma Linda had prescribed 2 a day, and Long Beach had prescribed 1 a day... anyway... I think it's all sorted out now. At least I hope so.

-Last but not least.... Dad will be the King of the Mardi Gras party next Wednesday. He was the one who got the plastic baby in his piece of cake, so it's a pretty big deal. Everyone stops me in the hallway and keeps telling me, "Do you know your Dad is the King of Mardi Gras?" Megan and I are going to try to be there next Wednesday to get some good pictures and videos!

So, look for a Mardi Gras blog next week! It should be a fun one!

Good Start to the New Year

This is what my table looks like when I make phone calls to the Veteran's Association about Dad's hospital bills... every all laid out, at my finger tips... but maybe now I'll be able to put it away for good.

As you all know we've been battling Dad's hospital bills from April of last year when he ran away, subsequently got picked up in an ambulance, and received stitches on his head. The bills for this episode totaled about $8000.

After applying for ER assistance from the Veteran's Association, and re-applying when we were denied, I am happy to say that 8 months later, the huge hospital bill has been taken care of. I was so upset when I received mail from the VA the other day indicating that they only paid $435.00, but after a quick phone conversation, I have been told that any payment by the VA is considered 'full payment' and the hospital cannot bill us anymore. Huge weight off our shoulders!!!

The last bill remaining is the ambulance bill and that has been re-submitted by the lovely lady who I spoke with on the phone. They will only pay ambulance fees if the ER fees have been paid (paid!), so I hope it's only a matter of time before this last bill is settled as well.

On another note, I received a notice from the local VA reminding us to schedule a colonoscopy for Dad. UGH. There is a lot of 'preparing' for a procedure like this one, if you know what I mean, and I still have nightmares from the last time we prepped him for it two years ago! My defiant inner child is pouting, "No! I DON'T want to do it." On the other hand, I guess Dad's care-takers at Whittier will have to deal with everything, so maybe I should just schedule the appointment. Or not? I mean, he has Alzheimer's so why put him through that procedure... I don't know. Such a strange dilemma. Should we even be worried about preventative procedures? Am I awful to think this way?

Anyway, Thank You to the VA for the long, but ultimately helpful process of taking care of Dad's hospital fees. We'll try not to bother you with any more of those. :)

The Business Side of Things

I spent my morning yesterday doing paperwork for Dad... some good and some bad.

We got an offer on Dad's mobile home! And of course we took it! The lady is giving us a down payment and she will pay us rent until the beginning of next year when she will take over the mortgage. So, I signed everything and sent that off.

The other paperwork involved hospital bills from when he was in the hospital back in April after he ran away. We got an ambulance bill for $1000 a couple of months ago and I appealed to the VA for financial help since Dad only has Medicare Part A which doesn't cover ER bills. Then, two months later I got two more bills (this time for the ER)... one for $7400 and another for $1000!!! I don't know why I didn't think about the actual ER bills, but obviously Dad can't afford this, so I am appealing to the VA again and we're contacting a financial counselor affiliated with the hospital.

Unfortunately the process with the VA takes so long that I have a feeling we're going to be sent to Collections... I guess we'll just have to see what the financial counselor says.

Yesterday I was visiting Dad and I checked out his new laminate hardwood floors. The smell in his room is so much better although I think Dad is still peeing in other places other than the toilet. When I was picking up his dirty clothes from the bottom of the closet they were all wet. Wet with pee, oh goodie! I pulled all the clothes out and even though laundry is generally done on Tuesdays, Whittier place said they would wash all his clothes for him. I noticed that the closet door is always open and the bathroom door is always shut, so he probably doesn't even think about the bathroom, he just knows that he has to pee and ends up walking to the open door.

Dad's roommate is also gone. They didn't tell me why, but it's too bad because he was really a sweet guy. I informed the manager of the Dementia Ward that Ken's family may be calling about some missing clothes because when I looked in Dad's closet, most of the clothes were Ken's.

Apparently Dad helped the activities coordinator plant some radishes and summer squash in the garden. We spent some time watering all the plants and we ate a couple of the tomatoes off the tomato plant. He really has a great home at Whittier.

Later during my visit, we all walked to the big dining room so they could do their daily exercises and trivia. As we were walking down the hallway, I could hear a couple of the patients behind me say, "Where are we going?" and someone answered, "I don't know. I forgot." "Oh, Okay." I was giggling to myself because it was so sweet and so true.

Dad's rash is getting better but he is still itching like crazy. He took his second dose of Scabies medication yesterday so hopefully it really kicks in. I attached a photo of Dad's new floor and a video of him trying to do the exercises (I love the confused look on his face). He is the least coordinated out of all the patients. When they are doing arms exercises, he moves his legs and vice versa. At least he is involved with the group activities.

I've also been asked to write a post on another blog. The blog is about feeling better no matter what condition/cause your experiencing. I don't think they've had anyone write about Alzheimer's yet, so that will be a nice addition. Here is a link to the blog http://blog.dimmi.com/
I'll let everyone know when I write something.

A Lucid Moment

While visiting the Doctor the other day, Dad was in pretty good spirits and was cracking us up with funny moments (as seen in the video below). The appointment started to drag on because we were talking to the NP for quite a while and Dad started to get antsy. He kept telling Megan "all they want is our money." She had to explain that this was the VA and she showed him the Air Force insignia on the wall and the American Flag in the corner of the waiting room. That calmed him down, but he still thought that they wanted our money.

After the appointment, the nurses tracked down Megan outside and asked if they could come back so that Dad could get some immunizations. They decided to get some lunch first and then go back because Megan was afraid he wouldn't want to go back in the place that is trying to take his money.

When they went back to the VA, they had to wait for a while and from what Megan made it sound like, Dad had a small awakening. I think he suddenly remembered that he was a Dad and he felt this urge to be there for us or help us out. He asked Megan, "Where have I been? Did I go away when you were little? My brain has gone to mush." Megan said she lived with Paula when she was little, and Dad replied, "Oh, Paula." It's a surreal moment when you have to explain to your Dad why he got divorced. He seemed to know that it was kind of his fault and he asked Megan if he was as an asshole. And she nicely replied, "A little bit." And he asked, "Why? Why was I mean?"

This is the closest thing to a serious Father/Daughter talk that we're ever going to have with Dad and it almost brought tears to Megan's eyes. In a disease where we try to hold on to any lucid moment with Dad, Megan was glad for this one.

It was such a heartbreaking conversation and he kept telling Megan how he was so proud of her, and he remembered things about her life - where she lives, her boyfriend. He asked her if Tony was treating her all right. It's definitely one of those real moments that we don't get very often with Dad. I wish I was there to witness it. Hopefully there will be more, but it's quite possible there won't be.

A Clean Bill of Health, Physically

The Doctor's Appointment went well. It seems Dad is still quite healthy except for a slightly elevated glucose level (which is common in patients who have a past of Alcoholism). This was the first time we had been to this particular VA office, and we really liked the Nurse Practitioner, Dr. Reed. Her Mother has Alzheimer's so she is very familiar with the disease and answered all of our questions. She classified Dad as being in the moderate stage, although my Mom and I seem to think he's on the cusp between moderate and the beginning of severe. I kept telling the NP that this was a good day so he's usually worse.

I'm pretty sure Dad has lost more weight since the last Doctor's visit. I think total it's been 10-12 pounds in 2 months. Dr. Reed didn't seem too worried about that when I asked her if we should be. We'll just monitor that I guess.

He's still got that rash and it looks really bad, not to mention it is itching like crazy. We finally got referred to a dermatologist. That is some good news. Hope we don't have to wait too long for the appointment.

We also learned that the elevated glucose level could contribute to some erratic behavior. I said, "I know that Alzheimer's targets the memory and physical coordination, but sometimes it seems that he is acting kind of crazy." She replied that it was sometimes normal in Alzheimer's patients, but it could also be due in part from his elevated glucose. We asked if we should be limiting his consumption of certain foods and she replied, "At this point in his life, I wouldn't worry about limiting anything." Which is exactly how I feel. We've got to let him enjoy the parts of life he has left.

I guess I kind of wanted a more concrete diagnoses of where Dad is at right now. I go back and forth between Dementia and Alzheimer's because Alzheimer's is a specific form of Dementia (which he definitely has) but is really difficult to 100% diagnose. However, through a process of elimination and thorough testing, Doctors today can diagnose to what they refer to as probably Alzheimer's disease with almost 90% accuracy. We're pretty sure that's what he has since it runs in the family and many of his symptoms are pretty specific, but he has never been completely diagnosed with it. The only way that Alzheimer's can be fully diagnosed is after death when a brain scan can be examined for certain microscopic changes caused by the disease.

I've read numerous things about what the brain looks like in an Alzheimer's patient, things like.... the brain shrinks (and kind of shrivels) as the disease progresses because of nerve cell death and tissue loss... ventricles in the brain (large fluid-filled spaces) grow larger which causes the brain to look like it has holes in it - like swiss cheese... Plaques, abnormal clusters of protein fragments, build up between nerve cells and are a prime suspect of cell death and tissue loss in the brain....

www.Alz.org gives a tour of the brain in an Alzheimer's patient and it makes my stomach uneasy. It's strange to think that my Dad's brain is shrinking and shriveling... kind of like it is slowly dying.

It also says that the average life span of someone with Alzheimer's is 8 years. But, then it breaks it down a little more...
Mid-moderate Alzheimer's can last from 2-10 years...
Severe Alzheimer's can last from 1-5 years....

There is so much to learn about this disease but still never enough answers.